be love

"...The human perception of this energy first begins with a heightened sensitivity to beauty." - James Redfield (The Celestine Prophecy)


It's one of those days.

Earth

Earth, originally uploaded by TraceyChan.

I was going to do something, and it ended up being something else, so I don't know what it is anymore.
That's it really. Still getting used to the tablet.
I have paintings started on my wall and I don't like them at all.

Grenada Arts Council Show

Dear everyone in Grenada,
Please join us for the show if you can. There's enough time!
If you're not going to make it and or you're in another country, (ie most of my readers), I'll be posting the works after the show opens.
Lovely.
See you there!

Moved

Day 137, originally uploaded by TraceyChan.

“When the whistle blew and the call stretched thin across the night, one had to believe that any journey could be sweet to the soul.” - Charles Turner

I just reviewed the site, and realised I forgot to mention that within a few months, I basically decided to quit my job, pack up my crap, travel, and move to Grenada. This was not as random as some may think, and I am not as crazy as I seem. Ok, maybe I am. During my decision-making hell period, someone said something that I shouldn't let the time pass by, because years down the road, I might look back and realise it's too late. Ergo, a classic case of "If not now, when?"

Last year was highly stressful at work and I was unhappy. Coming down to go-time, everything that happened in my life pretty much was a huge red flag that I needed to do something. Like I needed more validation! I spent days and nights torn and depressed, doing endless research.

It's not been easy, but anyway, here I am. I did it. Holy paintbrushes I did it!
Now that I am settled in for the most part, and totally focused on my work for the first time in my life, (squee!), I can finally tell the world, or somesuch. Well, I just did.

I must say I have wonderful supporters: my parents (who I absolutely shocked), and amazing amazing friends (who I also shocked).
My rocks, my loves, Thank You.
I am one of the most difficult people to live with, work with and love, and yet, these people continue to support me in my seemingly crazy efforts to do what I must do, however grudgingly.

Enough of the emo nonsense. There's work to do.

Painted

I confess.
I didn't want to dirty my top with paint, so I resorted to digital painting today.
I've been getting used to my Wacom Bamboo (too poor atm for an Intuous/Cintiq - sigh) and it's pretty fun  - just need quality time with it. I have no idea how people have patience to do the fancy schmancy illustrations. I cannot stay seated for that amount of time.
Digital is a whole different thing to getting down and dirty with materials in hand. There is no other feeling like it. I truly enjoy the physical aspect of work... sweating and aching the day after when you've had to be in odd positions. I love it though. I have missed it. I miss drawing classes.
Of course now I must tackle the rolls of brown paper in the corner, with which I trudged through St. George's hills.

see more dog and puppy pictures

Lolcats and loldogs are sometimes the best part of my day. Really.

Sometimes I feel like my pug buddy here, especially in the art world, in a very traditional space, where it's too small, where everyone who doesn't know, probably will, eventually.

I apparently LOVE challenges.
Everyone asks : WHY of all the goddamn places in the world, WHY Grenada?!?!?!
I must be a masochist who loves the beach.

And that is all.

leaving words of love

The beast sleeps in the still of the night,

while beauty dances upon its dreams.

Kendall was the only one to leave me something pretty, when I requested it. Thank you! I decided to call this a collaboration. My bbm status was : la bestia esta durmiendo (the beast is asleep), and that everyone should leave me messages of love.
I woke up to find the cutest message which floored me so early in the morning - what a great prezzie!  :) I was of course immediately inspired to do something about it.
This tiny thing has led me to create another project, so you'll be seeing some of that soon.

Meanwhile I am procrastinating and have an exhibition to prepare for! The theme is killing me!

it's time

Agreed. More than you ever thought.

Escapay

Actually this piece is so last week when I felt pressured and crap from The Pool. Oh and I just dubbed you, ridiculously talented wonderful people, 'The Pool'. It's all in the general commitment-phobe theme. That'll be my theme I suppose (personally) for the next few months. *snicker snicker scheme scheme*

I'm brimming with:

• nervous energy
• excitement
• passion

maybe in that order, maybe not.
I feel quite guilty posting the old work here, but.. I may only because they're possibly rather pretty.

Holy pixels artkid! new followers!

Goddammit. You guys are making me peek out of my little hermit hole. Thank you though I think I need to be surrounded by creatives and somehow guiltily forced into creating. *Snicker* Oh how I hate/love you.

I just one-night-standed Ms Paint to make that piece of crap graphic. *facepalm* Shoot me. It was quick, I was desperate, and I don't have PS on this machine (gasssp). Suckit.

Maybe I'll make a living doing really cheapass gross graphics. Oh..wait... *snicker*

I just went on a follow-blog spree. I feel all tingly and connected to people. Hah. Thanks for the followings new followers! Hope I don't traumatize you!
I'm making a bit of a switcheroo, from the main blog - which I've now dubbed the 365 blog, and I'll do more drawy, artsy crap here. Right. Needed to do that. Whew.Trust me folks, these days, the little victories count. Hard. It also helps that it's a slow day at work with no one annoying the hell out of me.

Anyway bit of mush here, but goddamn you people are talented. Holy shit! I'm absolutely proud of the work you all are doing.

I'll get to my whiny, self-deprecating artistic inadequacy post later on.

Ofili vs Doig

I was reading this Bombsite chill article with a foreword by Leon Wainwright, followed by a discussion/interview of sorts between Chris Ofili and Peter Doig. It's 2 years old I think, but it's quite timelessly brilliant and relevant to painters and artists of all kinds.

It fascinates me that some painters work for long hours on 1 painting... I am not sure if that's the way I work. I don't work like that. Ever. I'm impatient. I like getting things done immediately, especially artwork, though I guess even that has its exceptions. I spent a couple weeks on that damn scroll ... but I supposed if it was a mural or something I would have taken a lot longer. Don't know. It was all freehand and almost automatic.

I've been on a journey to get back to the creative space, to find studio time, and to actually focus on what I love. I've been working in a day job that makes studio time impossible without burning myself out. Damn you artist plague! I'm working to escape from that at all costs - probably pretty high costs too, but it's probably worth it.

Committing... it's a problem. clearly.

I have decided by the way I should actually keep posting shit here, because, err I have new followers, so I would feel abnormally guilty and such for abandoning this blog. Sigh.
In lieu of such grand statements : I will try my very best to post something artily interesting as often as possible, if not my own work. *pinky swears*
Right, so.. no huge expectations within the next few months, because I'm plotting and scheming. Ok? Good. :P
Marginal commitment only! Hah. There's also the main blog. *hint hint please follow there too!*

guilt

is terrible for the artist conscious. So I'm not guilty for abandoning this project for so long. It takes strange hours to get me going.Too many sites and things...arghhh and I just joined BlogHer. Sheesh!

I've been working and scheming and planning my life. (Yayyy go me!)

More action is  going on on the main art blog (though this should be it) Gawd.
The Photo365 project is going well though I need to be more technically focused. I have been distracted though. Ah well.

I'm getting there slowly, and within the next few months I'll be doing new and fantastic things. :)

No ... it's a secret.

Never fear, it'll come together. It has taken me far too long to realise that I need to live for me, and do my own work, and just do what I want to do. No one else is doing it for me! Duh!

You might notice...

A little change, oh here and there. I registered a new domain name last night, so for now it's directing you here. This may be temporary. There's a ton of changes happening soon...soon. I have to balance doing new work and actually working on putting it up. Insanity. It's a full-time job, which I already have! Sheesh!

arrrrr

Alright, so I find myself pre-blogging any time I actually have a moment to myself. Happy Halloween/All Saint's/All Souls/Día de los Muertos or whatever. I don't celebrate any of it, but I do feel like a little zombie ghost thing though. That was my intention when I opened Illustrator this morning. Sorry my brain is a little fried.

So much so that I posted this on the wrong blog. Hurrah for fried brains mmmm yummy.

Actually I was just  too lazy at the time to bother.

rabbit rabbit

Happy September all! This was a quickie done while talking to Dre on the phone. Haha. No he was not the inspiration. I can't remember the conversation either, but anyway. This is really a backblog, and I did this on the 2nd Sept, and I am a cheaterweater, but I can't help but post him up. I call him rab-rab. Have a wonderful month full of everything good; bunnies included.